Good news

Biopsies were normal. Whaddaya know? Once again, I have much to be thankful for.

Well, crap

I'm back. Today I had my first annual mammogram since the cancer episode last year. A few months ago I had a follow-up mammogram just on the left side and it was perfectly clear. So I didn't expect there to be any glitches today. There was, though...the radiologist found some odd calcification patterns that makes him want to look more closely. Which means a biopsy. Oh, and there are two odd areas, so I'll actually get 2 biopsies. Not scheduled yet.

So how am I taking it this time? A lot less hyper, a lot more sober. Maybe scared. Just a little pissed since I have so much to do in the next few months and I was on a great roll...now not so much.

I want to hurry through it and get it over with, no matter what "it" is. I have house painters coming, a bedroom that needs a new floor so I can put my new bed on it. A birthday party to plan. A visit with son and family. So many great things. I think maybe what I'll do is just have a little retreat from my normal life for a couple of days and then hop back on the train. I don't want to ignore any emotions, but I also don't want to get mired in them. It usually works just fine if I give the sadness and fears a deadline.

That reminds me...I just got a book from the library that I probably wasn't going to read: Feel the Fear and Do it Anyway. Ick. Not my favorite thing to think about. But now it sounds like it's almost a prescription for getting through this. Listen to me, you'd think I'd just gotten a death sentence. No, I'm aware that this is still just a preventive thing....no big bad diagnosis. And the radiologist did say it's probably not cancer, so I'm not going to freak out.

Again: is it cancer or not?

I just read an article on the InteliHealth web site about DCIS. It addressed the question of whether or not it's "really cancer." What I had was LCIS, the difference being one is ductal and one is lobular. The article was about ductal and suggested that maybe we shouldn't even be calling it cancer.

What I understand from the doctors I've seen over the last few months is that lobular is even less worrisome than ductal. However, the oncologist I spoke to said that they know so very little about LCIS that they really can't educate us too much about it.

Good pathology report

The surgeon called today to give me the good news: clean margins. I.e., no more cancer.

I'm feeling fine, everything is fine.

Thanks, everyone. Support is invaluable and I'm so happy I had a group of you out there rooting for me.

Surgery's done

I know this whole thing isn't over yet, but the surgery was certainly a giant step. I'm feeling pounds lighter, purely an illusion, but true none the less. Here's how I described the surgery on my other blog:

"It was so easy and interesting. How they get a wire in there with such accuracy was quite the puzzle to me, until the end of the procedure at which time the light dawned. They put a hollow needle in first. Then they fix the needle with great accuracy (and futzing around) to the coordinates and right at the metal clip that was inserted during the biopsy. Then, when it is just so, they feed a wire through the hollow tube. The end of the wire is kind of a hook. when it comes out of the needle it expands (not unlike a molly bolt) to anchor itself there. They take x-rays of it and send me off packing to the surgeon, who follows the wire and scoops out cancer cells."

I'm still a little bit out of it so may read this all in a few days and not understand a word of it. But right now I'm fascinated by the whole thing.

Thursday I get the results of the pathology. I would very much like a clean bill of health. I have developed a great respect for cancer and it's many patients. It never sounded easy, to be sure, but it now has a face and I understand even just a little bit better how difficult it really can be.

Tamoxifen

Anybody have any comments about tamoxifen? What you might have heard about it or anything else?

Good news

The information from Dr. Lechner couldn't have been better. He says my little spot of cancer is so "straightforward" that, if more cancer is not found during surgery, then he recommends only yearly mammograms after that. No radiation....did you hear that? "No radiation." That's just the best thing I've heard in a long time.

Oddly enough, I've been having a feeling lately that they would do the pathology after surgery and find NO cancer. I wondered if the biopsy could have removed it all already, and Dr. L. mentioned that as a possibility. Wouldn't that be interesting? A friend in the building, Karen, has a group of people who do healing prayers and she was quite sure they would pray all the cancer away. I thanked her heartily.

So on the 8th I go first to the radiology people to get a guide wire inserted. When they did the biopsy they put a metal clip in there to identify the area. So they will use the clip to aim the wire. Then I go across the street to the surgery center. The surgeon will somehow use that wire to guide him to the spot. Amazing.

They will remove the relevant spot plus a margin of tissue all around it. They dye each of the 4 sides of the 'block' of tissue removed. Each side is a different color. Then it's sent to pathology where they look for cancer cells, expected as well as unexpected ones. If they do find a surprise, they can tell by the color of the dye where to find the new guys.

The results will be available by the 10th. I don't know which doctor tells me the outcome, but if it's the oncologist, my appointment with him is the 16th. At that time I not only find out the results of the pathology, but we also will decide on a follow-up plan. Besides the yearly mammograms, I can elect to take Tamoxifen for 5 years as a breast cancer preventive Rx. Trouble is, one of the other medications I take may interfere with the goal of the Tamoxifen so I have to decide what to do about that other Rx. (FYI: fluoxitene, aka prozac)